i miss bebe truck loads :)


i don't like the bag i bought yesterday =.=
ya i know, the more i look at it the more i dislike it.
it's so heavy, wonder why i bought it.
should have listen to bebe and get that bag that he fancy.
but to me, first look at it, it looks like aunty use de.
but, saw the pics of the bag in the catalogue it's so much nicer.
too bad, don't have the colour i like.
argggggh! i wonder why this few days keep making wrong decision.
what is wrong with me?
anyway, today went to geylang again.
bought my baju kebaya for raya.
to me, it's not nice :(
don't have any idea why i bought it.
so troublesome, so low cut, need to buy a tube summore.
so traslucent, but my granny likes it.
the more i think, the more i feel like im living for the sake of others.
let everyone else influence my thinking, and whatever not.
my grandaunt from america or somewher just came back to celebrate raya
with us this time.
i felt like very guilty.
everyone in the family like cheating her money, getting her to buy all
our raya stuff (most), and whatever thats not.
=.= especially the family staying with her.
dont like! so what if she's rich?
when she's in financial difficulty never seen anyone helping her.
god! why does all these people exists?
and grann also another one.
okay, whatever, went to my mummy's godmother's place in
joo chiat to get that army shirt for ashton and my gold guitar shirt.
(meant for nighties)
i miss bebe, i miss him alot.
thought a lot of the things he used to said.
i felt so guilty for everytime going against him caus he meant well for me.
i never knew how else the world's outside seems like.
he described it to me.
he protect me from all those hurting and bad influence of life.
he's the reason i lived for.
for the many things we have disagreement about, i seriously wished
all these would change in the future.
i believed i can change his thinkings, i knew he can change mine.
he never wants me to feel the harshness of the real world.
forever by my side making sure nobody do anything to me.
i knew he meant the world to me.






i love you,bebe